It's been awhile...

Stuff going on...

Goin' back to Alaska on Sunday. I was really excited about it, but after yesterday, I am almost dreading it.

So much for "not ready right now."
The question is what did I do wrong?
And the answer is I don't know.

But it's hard. Real hard to fight off a sense of self-consciousness, inadequacy, etc. And bitterness. Which is a bummer. Because it's no fun being bitter toward people you otherwise like.

And another thing is that I have NO IDEA how "Christians" are supposed to act in situations like this. What am I supposed to do, just say, "Oh, well, it must just be God's will," and move on? Not likely.

This is so agggravating, yet so juvenile.



Let's see. I think I am going to stop thinking about OTHER situations that I had been thinking/concerned about. Doesn't seem like there's much there to devote mental energy to anymore.

Wow- getting kinda bummed.

I hope that me and my buddies can get jobs relatively close to each other though. That would be very encouraging to me. I know it probably shouldn't be, but that's how my head works.
I've uncovered some interesting faults in myself this summer. Some of them David pointed out, without even knowing it. Others have pointed out different ones. And I have unearthed some on my own.

I don't know how to fix them, and I don't know whether it's even important to fix them. They're not faults that are affecting anyone else. Or are they?

Ugh. Can I go back to bed?