Crisis Zone

Welcome to my life-
A disaster area.
The FEMA folks are on their way to clean up my brains. They're rattling around in my head. I think they do that because I don't use them enough. After so much inactivity, my brains just kinda... come unglued from the shelves they rest on.

This semester has been a complete disaster from start to finish. BUT IT'S OKAY! I don't mind. I have grown closer to God, and learned a ton about what Jesus said while He was here, and what He may have meant by it. All else is secondary.

I have learned about myself a bunch, too. Unfortunately, I don't think I like anything I found out. I am not lazy, but I do procrastinate until way beyond an appropriate time. I am childish. I am annoying. I am scared. And I am quickly growing out of being devilishly good-looking. :)

I am, however, genuine, caring, and a few other good things.

Some people would disagree with the bad things, while others would disagree with the good. You know what? That's okay, too!

Yancey has some really good stuff to say. It's not exegetical. It's not scientific. But it is still useful.

What else did I learn...
I learned that guys are a lot easier to deal with than girls. But not always. Girls are easier to talk to. But not always.
I learned a lot of things that I already knew, but refused to believe.
I learned that people, in general, never change.
I learned that my perceptions of people are generally true. That one woman is a weirdo- I had that right.
That other girl, she's just strange. I gave her too much benefit of the doubt.
That one guy is still not interested in being my friend much. Yeah, I know, he's still busy. He's been busy for two years.
That other guy is a way better friend to me than I am to him. But I still consider him my best friend.
Some people are trustworthy, and will keep your secret to their dying day. Others won't.
Some people concern themselves only with what they see, feel, and want. Others are taken by deep inner needs and ponderous thoughts. It's best to be in the middle.

I learned that God has mysterious ways. I knew it- but I learn it more and more as time goes by. Things that I think are guaranteed... are not. Things I think will stay the same... change in the biggest ways. People I think will be around... are suddenly taken. Lessons I beg Him to impart in me... He skips for lessons He knows I need.

I learned that there are things that I don't agree with. I knew that already, but it hit home more this semester than ever before. I learned that I may not believe in some of the things that I believe in. Some of the things I believe to be correct, may not be correct.
And all that is okay too- God is making me into the person He needs me to be. I hope that I let Him change me.

I learned that I fail sometimes. Things I thought I had long ago buried... sometimes come back and haunt, or even command, me. Struggles that I claim I don't have... well, turns out I still have them. The problems I deny are some of the biggest problems I have.

I learned that I like quiet. My parents would never believe it. But it's true. Except for when I like things loud.

I learned that you can't tell a person the truth. You can, but don't expect them to listen. Especially when they want you to tell them a lie. Sometimes, telling it like it is proves to be a waste of breath.

I learned that I will type on this blog instead of doing materials papers... like I am doing right now.

I learned that when I am afraid I might fail, I generally don't even try.
I learned that I can turn against people in the blink of an eye. Good friends aren't subject to this. But acquaintances are.

I learned that some people are going to rub you the wrong way no matter what. You just can't get along with everybody all of the time.

I learned that even what you say in private to yourself can sometimes be brought into the limelight and used against you.
I learned that sometimes, friends come out of the most unlikely of places. From the rags of a missed opportunity comes the chance to make a different friend.

I think that'll do it for now.
Leave a note if you like.